My Story

Christmas Day 2020 transformed my life and led me to realize my true calling.

(A post-surgery update at the bottom.)

I thought I knew my purpose. 

Growing up, all I wanted to be was a special agent. That was my goal, my purpose, and everything I did was focused on achieving that goal. I wanted to be the good guy, and I wanted to help people.

For me, being the good guy was rooted in the fact that I grew up in a Christian family. We lived in a middle-class suburban city where Sunday church was regular. As a result, I've always believed in God. My relationship with Him has been hot and warm over the years but never cold. He has always been in my life. 

I joined a new church when I was 18. 

Years later, I would eventually meet my wonderful wife (Renee) at the same church's singles group. We both valued having a relationship centered on Godly values, and we still do.

Fast Forward approximately forty years. 

As a world-traveling special agent, I have long since accomplished what I thought was my purpose. As my career in law enforcement comes to a close, I am fortunate to have been able to do what I love with the lady I adore. 

Now is the time to embrace our golden years.

Now let's return to Christmas 2020.

I was told I had COVID on December 25, 2020. It was bad, and every day it got worse. I was sick for two months and couldn't work. I thought I was going to die more than once. I got bad advice from a doctor, so I never went to the hospital. Later, I was told that I was a long hauler with COVID. Even after almost two years, I still have symptoms.

I went back to work in March 2021. 

I took an ambulance to the emergency room on my second day back at work. 

The thought was, "I might be having a heart attack." Again, the idea "I might die" came into my mind. 

The heart attack was ruled out, which is good. But I had other things going on.

After many tests and procedures, I received my diagnosis. 

First, I was lucky to be alive. I had inflammation of my heart and lungs and was recovering from pneumonia that I didn't even know I had. The ER staff said I should have been in the hospital and should have died from COVID. 

My beliefs were confirmed.

Then they dropped the big news. 

I had a defective heart valve and needed open heart surgery, which would happen before I left the hospital. 

My first thought was that I hadn't seen my wife (due to COVID, she could not enter the hospital). 

I needed a second opinion, and if heart surgery happens, it will not be in this hospital. 

All I could do was pray. Four days later, I was released and told I needed to fix the heart valve soon. 

After six months and countless testing, the results came in: I required heart surgery before Christmas 2021.

In October of 2021, I underwent an angiogram to prepare for my heart surgery. 

Just days after the treatment, I was in excruciating pain and rushed to the emergency room. 

My arm developed a blood clot as a result of the angiogram. 

The heart operation was now scheduled for November.

One of the most important questions we continually ask ourselves is, 

"Why am I experiencing this? 

Why did this transpire? 

Why does this issue exist in my life?" 

The response is always the same for believers, it's to make us more like Jesus.

With three life-threatening experiences and heart surgery scheduled for November 23rd, 2021, I began to do an audit of my life. 

When I stand before God, what would I say? What would God say to me? 

I discovered God is far more interested in what I am than in what I do. 

He's far more interested in my being than in my doing. 

Many people ask, "What is God's will for my life in my job or career?" 

We could probably have two dozen different careers, and God would say that's fine. 

However, God is more interested in our character, and I'll tell you why – we are not taking our career into eternity but we are taking our character.

I reflected on a church Renee and I attended in St. Louis. On the walls were two massive statements. They said, "Honor God" and "Help People." I've always tried to do both, but I had them backward for years. 

In my career, I was more focused on helping people. 

I also realized I was missing a few other essential purposes God had for me. 

In fact there are five purposes we all have. 

According to the Bible, our first purpose is to be like Christ and progress in Him, which is known as discipleship. 

God created us in order to shape us into the image of His son, Jesus Christ. ACTS 2:42

Our second purpose, according to the Bible, was designed for a family, and that family on Earth is called the church - and that's fellowship, which He enjoys. ACTS 2:46

The Bible states we were created for God's pleasure, and we bring God joy when we worship Him. 

That is not just how we sing but also how we live our lives. 

Worship is our third purpose. ACTS 2:43

Our fourth purpose, according to the Bible, is that we were fashioned for service; God uniquely wired us to contribute. We weren't put on this planet only to take up space, breathe, and die. 

We were put on this planet to make a difference. And this is what we call our ministry. 

What is ministry? 

Ministry is defined as each time you use the talents God has given you to help someone else in Jesus' name. ACTS 2:45

Evangelism is the fifth reason God put us on Earth. If we want God to bless us, we have to care about the things that God cares about the most. 

And that means bringing the lost back to Jesus. 

This is the thing that God cares about the most. ACTS 2:47

Although I've been a saved Christian for many years, I have not been as vocal as I should be about sharing the news of God's love and redemption and living my purpose. 

I want people to say I served God's purpose when I'm gone. 

The problem was that other people, plans, programs, pressures, and difficulties distracted me from my purpose.

That has all changed for me now. I am now focused on Gods purpose for my life.

This website is one way I hope to fulfill Gods purpose. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I would love to hear your story and pray for you. 

Clicking the message icon in the lower right is just one way to send me a direct message.

(Post-Surgery Update)

2024

It's been almost four years since I first came down with COVID and nearly three year since having my Open Heart Surgery. Not only did they find a defective heart valve, they found and fixed other issues that could have resulted in instant death had they not been discovered.

I have become aware that COVID can uniquely mess with my body's functions. 

Things that were being regulated with medication suddenly stopped responding, and everything needed to be adjusted. These adjustments take time.

Ironically I got Covid again in June 2022 and took a giant step backward and once again began adjusting medication based on the situation. 

I currently have an entire staff of medical professionals in various specialties working with me weekly to keep my body and mind in check, and each week we make a little progress.

Know this: 

Being a Christian does not make us immune from pain and suffering. 

In fact, I would say you are probably more susceptible to pain and suffering as a Christian. 

I know that God used my pain to bring awareness to a much bigger issue and heal me.

But know, the promise God gives us is this: 

We have a constant companion walking with us, never leaving us. 

That's the difference between being a Christian and an unbeliever. 

We wouldn't know His power if we were never thrown into a fire. 

We wouldn't know He was a healer if we had never faced an illness.

We wouldn't know He could move mountains if we never faced an obstacle.

Ultimately, I know this, I walked out of the hospital on November 26th 2021 alive because Jesus was with me, and it was his will.